Who Said being an INFJ is Easy?

Sometimes... I feel like I’m always doing kind of failure, that everything I do is always end up being a mess or something, including in educational stuff, jobs, my works, and even in love relationship. That’s why I am more caring to people’s problem instead of my own because whenever I help them out, I feel more like a hero, a useful person, or at least a good friend. I always hide my problem whenever I can and kind of hate it if someone is too get into my personal problem. If it happens, I usually say,

“It’s none of your business.”

I know they’re just trying to find out about my problem and help me to solve it, but I feel like, “I’m okay, just mind your own business.” because I’m afraid if people are getting too close to me, they will end up being so protective and possessive, and I — who love freedom more than anything — will surely disliking that kind of act despite their good intention to help me. Moreover, I hate those kind of people who know all of my problem but instead of helping me, they would just scold me behind my back. So what’s the point to share it all to everyone if they would just make my problem more difficult for me to handle?

I know I’m a kind of difficult person to befriend, and I realized that I act tough like that because I’m not a good guy but just an ordinary man who wanna act honest and real to everyone despite my fear of unintentionally hurting people by it. I often push people away because sometimes (or maybe most of time) I wanna being alone. It doesn’t mean I don’t need any friend beside me, but I just need a time to, say it, recharge. But after I get fully recharged, I still need everyone to help and to be helped as always. I often feel bad by pushing people away like that and I’m sorry if you too are getting irritated due to it. I just need to be alone occasionally, and I hope they’re gonna understand it.

To make it simple:
I don’t always need you if I have a problem since I usually find anything out by myself because I don’t wanna bother you too often. But if you need me whenever you have a problem or something, just call me out. If the universe allows me, I’m surely gonna help you as long as I’m able to.